Political fisticuffs

Ukraine parliamentI think politicians don’t inflict violence upon themselves nearly enough. There are a lot of politicians I wish bodily harm upon, however I have somewhat of a fondness for my freedom. So, I have to anxiously wait for the moment that politicians get what’s coming to them. Unfortunately, in America, actual politician on politician violence is rare. Perhaps it is because almost all our politicians are lawyers, but they’re usually too wussy to actually kick each other’s asses. Ukraine had  food fight, Taiwan had a massive brawl, and politicians from all over the world get their fight on. What does America get? A Weiner throwing a hissy fit.

Jesse Ventura WrestlingPerhaps the problem is we never elected enough nut jobs like Jesse Ventura, or that we simply never put him in congress. I could write a long list of congressmen I’d love Ventura to do the Body Breaker on. Jesse wasn’t necessarily a good politician but that’s a oxymoron anyway, isn’t it? The key is he might just be stupid enough to attack a bunch of lawyers.

I think we should encourage widespread steroid use amongst politicians, they couldn’t possibly do any more damage to our country and they might do something more useful with their time, like work out and go into fits of rage and try to kill each other. Until something changes, I’ll just have to amuse myself with the Weiner remix. May be we should just send some guys like Dale Peterson to Washington D.C…

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