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Breakthrough in couple-research!

What sucks more than doing the laundry? Sorting and folding socks!!

Here’s the solution we’ve been waiting for:

"Sockification"

Until now we’ve seen great inventions in regards to washing machines, dryers, dishwashers, irons, … but we were left with the agonizing task of finding the right pairs of socks.  Researchers at UC Berkeley have invented the first sock sorting machine.  A Sockinator!

It can determine which socks go together, even the ones that are inside out. The result: Neatly paired socks … and one shiny dowel ; )

The robots are now up for general pre-order should anyone want one (priced well into the “if you have to ask” range, surely).  Before you check with Amazon or the Home Shopping Network, please consider the following:

The robot can only detect patterns that are programmed in its computer,  and it takes about 15 minutes per pair.

Now we only need a washing machine that doesn’t lose socks!

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College football preview: SEC

College football preview: SEC

Alabama SEC ChampionshipAlabama

Last season: 14-0, 8-0 in SEC; defeated Florida 32-13 in SEC Championship game; defeated Texas 37-21 in BCS National Championship game

Returning starters: 8 on offense, 2 on defense, 0 on special teams

Rising star: Trent Richardson made the most of his opportunities backing up Heisman Trophy winner Mark Ingram. Richardson rushed for 751 yards and eight TDs as a freshman in 2009.

They’ll win the division if: Defensive coordinator Kirby Smart can piece together another outstanding defense despite the fact that only two starters return from last year’s outstanding unit.

They’ll come up short if: QB Greg McElroy somehow can’t provide the exemplary leadership and ball security that he did in 2009. He threw just four interceptions last year.

Chatter: “I just hope that our fans are always realistic in what we can accomplish with the teams that we have, and that they keep a positive attitude about how we go about developing a first-class program.” — coach Nick Saban

Must-see game: vs. Penn State, 7 p.m. Sept. 11 (ESPN)

Top moment: There’s so many to choose from, but long before Bear Bryant arrived, Alabama wasn’t given a chance to defeat Washington in the Rose Bowl on Jan. 1, 1926. But Johnny Mack Brown led the Crimson Tide to a 20-19 victory over the Huskies in what has been called the most important game ever played by a Southern team.

Read more on Atlanta Journal-Constitution

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Good Drones Gone Bad!

In Great Satan’s arsenal of future weaponry being deployed today – those wild hottie naughty killer drones got tons of play!

Why cause?

Because – they got tons of game, bay bee!

Hunter killers like Predator and Reaper are notoriously bad girls – always just out of reach of the handwringing attorney brigade - they diss Pakistani sovereignty (yeah – what a hoot!) seek out and slay enemies and enemy enablers anywhere. Anytime. They. Want.

Aside from Sexy Beast - Great Satan also enjoys doing several recon drones – like Little Satan’s ‘Hunter’, and the Shadow (200 RQ 7) there is also Raven.

Sweet, petite, discrete and in heat - Raven actually returns kinda like a boomerang all on her own – no imposing imposed curfews required!

She’s tiny tiny – handheld and hand launched. Raven weighs in at four and a half pounds with a five-foot wingspan and barely 38 inches in length! Raven’s gig gives ‘farsight’ to cats on the ground in a tactical environment from subsquad level on up – thus, ensuring Great Satan’s enemies rec’v the nasty surprise on the battlefield while her forces are sweetly informed with real time intell.

Never has killed anyone – Raven is a good girl.

 

Pic “Raven is a good girl and almost always makes it home. “ sexed up beyond repair by the staff at GrEaT sAtAn”S gIrLfRiEnD

 
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To hell with them all

No pictures, nothing fancy looking, just a rant. I saw video of this quote today: “I don’t think you want me to waste my time to read every page of the health care bill.“. This was from Max Baucus regarding the mammoth 2,000+ page health care bill that Baucus helped author! It’s screwed up enough that most of the politicians that voted for the bill never read it (did anyone?), but this is one of the people that supposedly wrote it and even he didn’t read it. How in the bloody hell does a politician know what they’re passing if they haven’t read it? How in the hell can you write something without reading it? At best, it becomes a translation once you allow others to author it? How can you tell if the intent is retained if you don’t verify it?

These fucking morons passed a bill without knowing what it was in it, or even who wrote the damned monstrosity. It comes as no surprise that we are constantly finding out hidden and utterly fucked up tidbits in this miasma. It shouldn’t even warrant consideration that an author of a bill might not have read his supposed work. It should go without saying that politicians read what they are voting on. The Constitution and Bill of Rights was 6 pages. 6 PAGES!!!. Yet, these bacteria for brains sons of bitches think they’re entitled to inflict thousands of pages of mystery documentation upon us?

The health care bill was 400 times longer and sought to tear apart much of what the American Constitution stands for. I’m holding out faith that the much wiser and more competent people who authored those original documents were able to withstand even the barrage of a team of evil lawyers armed with a entire dead tree’s worth of assaults on our freedoms. They have attempted to tear apart what greatness remains in this country. I wish upon those that authored (who ever they actually are) and voted for this bill and bills like it every Chinese curse known to man. I wish upon them a sentence in hell that does not end until they read (and understood) in every language that has ever existed, every single word of ever single piece of legislation they ever voted on.

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TTT – Tiny Thumb Thursday – Sin

Sloth, the cutest of the seven deadly sins:

I am still debating if they make good pets… I know you can keep them as a pet, and they shouldn’t make too much of a mess since they don’t move much… but, most animals don’t make good pets…

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I bring you the Infernado

I don’t usually post cool things I find, because I don’t find most things to be cool. However, there are some exceptions. I won’t bore you with what causes it, just admire it’s awesomeness.

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COIN Versus Hyper Puss

 Hyper Puissance that is.
 
The debatable debate betwixt Great Satan’s warcraft intelligentsia argues Great Satan should deploy and specialize in one type of hegemonic hotness above any other.

TMP Barnett (and Andrew K – shout out to Ink Spots!) vixenly visioneers Great Satan deploying two 30 years in the future militaries

A “Leviathan Force” to engage in any future ancient set piece battles versus enemy panzergrenadiers, traditional army air forces, carrier battle groups, humanitarian interventions and a Surge ala COIN force to maintain stability in crunk and disorderly hoods.

Pic “Great Satan is kinda crazy and unpredictable – especially in war” by GrEaT sAtAn”s gIrLfRiEnD

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Tax dollars at work

California is having massive budget problems. On an unrelated note, a $578,000,000 school is unveiled in Los Angeles. On another completely unrelated note, the district has a shortfall of $640,000,000. The school comes complete with murals, marble memorial, swimming pool, and public park. This will be the most expensive public school in American history. The school district’s blame for high costs? Government regulations and union workers. They also wrote this semi-literate statement:

The construction of these schools was funded by bond money the voters approved to build new schools to relieve serous [sic] overcrowding in schools… By law, these funds could not be used to fund teacher salaries or to back fill budget shortfalls currently being experienced by the District and its [sic] meets the Board goal of relieving overcrowding in all our schools.

What the hell do I say? There will be 4,200 students in this K-12 school. That comes out to 323 new students a year. This means that in 50 years, assuming 0 costs for maintenance or improvements, they will have spent $35,789 per hypothetical student, simply for the facilities. They nearly could have purchased houses for what it costs to provide facilities for a student through the course of school. Something about that doesn’t make any damn sense to me.

This is why you do not let people vote to spend your money.

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I hope they don’t have a beeping microwave down there

Like this poor guy, who got his arm stuck in a furnace. With the microwave beeping constantly in the background.

33 miners are trapped underground in Chile.  After 3 weeks they were able to make contact with the rescuers.   But, drilling the hole to get them out will take at least 120 days.

Rescuers made contact with the miners by lowering a probe into the mine, 17 days after the men became trapped. The miners, stuck in a mine shaft shelter some 700m (2,300ft) down, sent up a note saying they were all alive. Rescuers are now preparing to drill a wider hole through which they can bring the miners to the surface. The chief engineer in charge of the rescue operation, Andres Sougarret, said a larger and more powerful drill would be needed to dig the hole at the San Jose gold and copper mine near the city of Copiapo. “A shaft 66cm (26 inches) in diameter will take at least 120 days,” he said. Rescuers plan to send narrow plastic tubes down the narrow borehole already drilled with food, hydration gels and equipment that will allow them to communicate with relatives – including cameras and microphones.

Complete story on BBC News

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They should be ashamed…

… for eating little girls!

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